NEVER-ENDING CONTRIBUTION, How to give even in times of scarcity

By Tony Robins

When you think of your life, do you think about what’s missing? Or do you think about what you have?

If you always think about what you don’t have, you will tend to hold on to everything that you do have, because you feel that you have so little and thus not much to give. But listen to Tony as he explains how giving in times of extreme discomfort, when you feel “lack” and not abundance, can be the most valuable.

13:34:00 - By Vincent 0

Taking Charge of the Balloon

By Michael Josephson

A man in a hot air balloon, realizing he was lost, lowered it to shout to a fellow on the ground, “The wind’s blown me off course. Can you tell me where I am?”

The man replied, “Sure. You’re hovering about 60 feet over this wheat field.”

“You must be an engineer,” the balloonist yelled.

“I am. How did you know?” the man replied.

“Well, everything you told me is technically correct but of absolutely no use.”

The engineer retorted, “You’re an executive, right?”

“How did you know?” the balloonist responded.

“Well, you were drifting in no particular direction before you asked my help and you’re still lost, but now it’s my fault.”

The balloon is a good metaphor for our lives. At first, all we want to do is rise as high as we can in terms of money, position and prestige. Yet as we rise wind currents push us sideways. Eventually, many of us discover that we’re on a very different course than we intended, a long way from the spot we took off from or hoped to end up at. So we blame the wind or anything else.

What we have to realize is that our power of choice is a steering mechanism that lets us respond to each breeze and gust. We can drift with or go against the current. Like haphazard wind currents, unplanned events beyond our control affect the direction of our lives. But, in the end, what we do and become is determined by our choices. The key is to be attentive, to look around to be sure we are going where we want to go.

Remember, character counts.

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14:03:00 - By Vincent 0

You Cannot Always Change Situations, but You Can Change Your Attitude

by Remez Sasson

I am sure that there are certain situations and circumstances in your life that you would like to change. Often, it is quite simple to make changes, but we let laziness, procrastination or fear to stand in our way.

You might be surprised to hear that many of the changes you would like to make are within you reach, and often, within your immediate reach.

For example, you might always complain that you have no time to read. If reading is so important to you, what’s so difficult to arrange your day so that you can find the time? You can always get up half an hour earlier in the morning, or give up half an hour of watching TV in favor of reading a book.

Do you want to learn a foreign language, swim twice a week or arrange your wardrobe? These are simple to accomplish goals, but you might always seek excuses why you don’t have the time for them. You simply do not give them any priority, and prefer to stick to your comfort zone.

Sometimes, we might encounter situations and circumstances that we are unable change. What should we deal with such situations?

If you cannot change a situation, accept it, and learn to live with it. Sure, this requires a certain degree of self-discipline and inner strength.

You might complain, resent the situation and the people involved and be unhappy. This would not help change the situation, and you will be creating suffering and unhappiness for you.

You cannot always change a situation or circumstances, but you can change your attitude toward it.

Changing external situations and circumstances might not always be possible, but changing your attitude is possible.

Read this sentence several times and try to remember it. You cannot always change situations and circumstances, but you can certainly learn to change your attitude. Instead of feeling resentful, frustrated and unhappy, you can learn to be calm, accept the situation, and not fight with it. You can try to look at the situation dispassionately, and try to find out what you can learn from it.

• Are there people you cannot get along with at work?
• Do you have neighbors you do not like?
• Is your boss too demanding?

Will you leave your job or go live somewhere else because of that?

Often, by accepting the situation, it will stop bothering you, or a solution might come along.

Various situations and circumstances could be lessons you need to learn, and after learning and acknowledging the lessons, the situations and circumstances will start to change.

If you accept what you cannot change and learn to live with it, it will stop to be an issue and stop to bother it.

When you accept what you cannot change, you save yourself a lot of energy and time, and can devote your time to better things than thinking about the situation you cannot change.

When you accept what you cannot change, sometimes, even without any effort on your part, as if miraculously, things start to change and improve.

Some people might misinterpret what I said and think that accepting situations means giving up. Others might regard acceptance as an excuse for laziness and doing nothing. This is far from the truth. Acceptance of situations that you cannot change is wisdom and not passivity, and has nothing with giving up and should not be an excuse for passivity.

You cannot change the past, and regretting and feeling bad about it is not going to change it. However, you can learn to stop dwelling on the past and move on.

If you don’t like one of your colleagues at work and you do not get along with him, anger and resentment would not help. However, you can try to be friendly and stop being resentful.

Suppose it is raining outside, but you need to go to work, go the grocery or meet friends. You cannot stop the train and you cannot fight the rain. Would you give up and stay at home, or wear a raincoat and go outside despite rain?

If it is very hot outside and you need to go somewhere, will anger and unhappiness change the weather? You can let thoughts about the weather to cause you suffering and unhappiness, and you can accept it and live with it.

When you change your attitude toward people, situations or circumstances they stop bothering you and they stop causing you suffering.

When you change your attitude, you start to feel better, you become happier, recognize opportunities to make changes, and on many occasions, the situations or circumstances you could not change, begin to change. By changing your attitude, situations and circumstances would start to change, as if by magic.

Are there any tools that can help you change your attitude? Yes, there are a few, such as repeating affirmations, practicing visualization and developing inner peace.

SOURCE

12:30:00 - By Vincent 0

5 Daily Positive Affirmations For Happiness In Life

BY Vernon Layne 

If your under-your-breath conversations were monitored for a day, what would that reveal about you?

Would there be a lot of self-talk berating yourself or there would be pep-talk encouraging yourself?

Perhaps there will be some talk back sessions getting the last laugh.

Most of us are careful about what we believe or whom we let into our life. We set limits on whom we listen to.

But for some reason we think we are supposed to believe everything we tell ourselves, right?

Don’t let self-defeating thoughts get the best of you.

Instead, win yourself over with daily positive affirmations.

Why Do You Need Daily Positive Affirmations

The voices of self-criticism in your head sometimes run rampant, draining you of all your positive energy.

When you see yourself in a negative light, you give off the negative energy that affects you mentally and physically. It can lead to health problems.

That is why the opinion of yourself and your circumstances are most important.

It is because they can have a positive or negative influence on not just yourself, but on people around you as well.

Did you know when you are listening and believing your lies, you are practicing insanity?

If I had a survey and asked people to describe insanity, I am sure most would say it is repeating the same mistake and expecting different results.

That is a good way to describe it but is it the best way? Does it tell us how people view themselves? Is it really a definition or just a quote?

During my research, one definition described insane being a state of mind that prevents normal perception, behavior or social interaction.

When Albert Einstein or Ben Franklin, depending on whom you ask, wrote this quote, he was not just referring to external actions but also internal actions that take place in our mind.

Please understand, for every action there is a reaction. Furthermore, behind every action there’s a thought and self-talk.

It is these internal dialogs we have over the years that become our truths.

When reality stares us in the face, and it is not in agreement with what we believe, our perception gets distorted preventing normal perceptions and causes us pain and unhappiness.

The saddest thing about these conversations is that they are usually negative and untrue, and they steal our joy.

That is why it is important we practice telling ourselves positive affirmations daily.

Henry Ford quoted, “whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you are right.”

Think of it this way: You having a build-in alarm that sounds and alerts you when yourself or others have not lived up to your expectations, beliefs and ideas. It sounds when your fixed ideas and reality are opposite polarity.

No matter how many times you have failed or how many mistakes you have made in life. The truth is you are doing better than you feel, and more importantly, you are doing better than you think.

“The unexamined life is not worth living for a human being.” ~ Socrates

How Daily Positive Affirmations Help You

Life and all its challenges can be rough at times and depending on how you respond internally, you can learn happiness in the mist of those rough times.

You are going to struggle constantly if you are not having a healthy conversation with yourself.

Give yourself a break and concentrate on the good things that are happening in your life. Yes, there are good things going on in your life too.

For example, you could start each morning with being thankful as you wake up. That is always a good start, and it is simple. Life is as simple as you see it.

Your feelings follow your thoughts, so finding the time and going through a mental gratitude list will remind you of things you are grateful for.

It will also help you develop a balanced sense of self-esteem and be in agreement with who you really are; a person with assets as well as liabilities.

Defeating negative thoughts before they become your reality and before your emotions send you that alarming sound you are all too familiar with is the best defense against unhappiness.

I’ve come up with five daily positive affirmations that you can tell yourself every morningand start your day on the positive note.

5 Daily Positive Affirmations For Happiness In Your Life

There’s no limit to the amount of power and happiness you can have when you believe these 5 positive affirmations:

Daily Affirmation 1: Today I Have Courage to Walk Through My Fears

Fear is behind many decisions you make or don’t make. They will destroy you mentally, physically and emotionally if you allow them to control your life.

Sometimes they are subtle and attack without you knowing. Perfectionism is a good example of this subtle fear.

Deep within you may feel you are not being exactly what you want or what you think others would like you to be.

So you try harder at being perfect, believing it will bring you happiness and acceptance.

But the shadow of those high expectations cast over you when they are not met. Then you default to doing the only thing you know; try harder.

The first step in defeating fear is accepting the fact that it is there and understanding it is normal. Your fears get stronger the longer you think about them, so redirect your thoughts to something positive.

Do the very thing that you are afraid of doing and your fears will slowly lose its power over you.

Daily Affirmation 2: Today I Forgive Myself and Refuse to be a Prisoner of My Past

Giving and receiving forgiveness is an essential part of discovering happiness.

Why, because it requires you to make peace with yourself, and that is hard when you feel you are the worst person on earth.

However, it is the only road to long-term contentment.

It is impossible to give someone something you do not have. Forgiveness is no different. How can you forgive others when you do not know how to forgive yourself?

Stop being held captive by your feeling. By choosing to forgive yourself you are no longer controlled by bitterness, anger, and resentment.

You will free yourself from the bad things you have done to yourself and others, and others have done to you.

Forgive yourself today, and your negative thought patterns and feeling will change for better. Each time it brings you closer to the person you are meant to be.

Daily Affirmation 3: Today I Seek Personal Growth, and I Will be Open-Minded

Change scares a lot of people. It does not matter if the change is positive or negative.

Some people do not like change and stay closed-minded and stop growing.

While others embrace it and continue improving like my family at Aha!NOW. We are constantly changing and growing. Click here to find out how.

When you are open-minded, you are teachable and can take advantage of what others have to offer from their knowledge and experience.

There’s too much to learn in life to be closed-minded. So humble yourself by remaining teachable and remember, its okay not to have all the answers.

Daily Affirmation 4: Today I Accept and Love Myself

The most valuable thing you can offer yourself and the world is being YOU. To do this, you must accept yourself fully; your assets, flaws, successes, and failures.

This helps you stop comparing your inside with others outside and helps you stop wishing you were someone else.

Instead, compare who you used to be with who you are becoming, and that is a person who strives to be human and not perfect.

Daily Affirmation 5: Today I Believe Everything I am Experiencing is Building Character Within Me

When you face your problems with patience and hope, it strengthens your character.

You’ll stop avoiding them, but welcome them knowing it is another opportunity to gain wisdom.

A positive attitude makes all the difference when facing difficult times.

It helps you see trails as character building blocks of hope, patience, and wisdom – the three essential ingredients for a peaceful and fulfilling life.

How To Practice Positive Affirmation Daily In Your Life

You may be wondering, “How do I implement these 5 positive affirmations into my life?” After all, they are meaningless without action.

First you need to make time. Don’t wait to start your self-examination. Moreover, don’t let obstacles stand in your way.

Set an appointment with yourself to meditate on your feelings and thoughts and write them down.

Next thing you need to do is be honest with yourself by opening your heart and mind about your past and your present circumstances.

You must ask yourself some critical questions. For example, “Is my self-esteem based on what others think of me?” or “Can I forgive myself?”

Denial protects you from your true feeling, but it also prevents you from believing other things like positive affirmations, so be honest as you can with yourself.

Once you see your negative thoughts on paper, ask yourself do you want to keep them or do you want to develop a better perspective. Remember you have a choice.

If you choose the latter then begin to tell yourself these five positive affirmations daily, and you will start experiencing positive actions supporting your new beliefs.

Replacing your old beliefs with new ones is the only way this will work.

“The only thing in the world you can change is yourself and that makes all the difference in the world.” ~Cher

It is simple to obtain what you want in life when you focus correctly.

When you are able to see the connection between what you are telling yourself and the consequence, you’ll be amazed at yourself and enjoy making decisions.

Telling yourself these five positive affirmations daily will help you do just that. They will help you look forward to life’s challenges, knowing that a peaceful and happy life is possible.

Over To You –

Do you believe in positive affirmations and practice them daily in your life? Share your thoughts, experiences, and affirmation in the comments.

SOURCE

13:30:00 - By Vincent 0

7 Easy Ways to Find Inner Strength

By Harleena Singh 

Do you want to know how can you find inner strength in your life? Do you have any idea where you’d look for it?

Of course, you do not have to venture out to discover your inner strength as that precious inner strength is within you, thus it is aptly termed so. However, sometimes it is okay to take help of external factors to find inner strength.

You must have often heard and read about people using their inner strength to overcome seemingly impossible difficulties and obstacles in their lives. You can do the same.

You need to understand that each one of you has the strength and support you need already within you – you just have to find it. Without finding your inner strength, you often tend to fall short of your goals.

Sometimes you need to keep looking out for things, people, events, and signs that will help you to connect with your inner strength.

Just like any other skill, inner strength can be searched, developed, and worked upon once you are ready. You do need to conduct certain exercises, engage yourself in activities, and make some efforts.

“You have within you right now, everything you need to deal with whatever the world can throw at you.” ~ Brian Tracy

What is Inner Strength

You need to first clarify the meaning of inner strength. Isn’t inner strength a state of mind? Doesn’t it depend on what you think about yourself and believe in all that you can do?

Inner strength is the strong conviction that comes from within, when you believe in yourself.

Your inner strength is expressed in forms of will power, positive attitude, belief, and confidence in yourself. It’s the positive image and assessment of yourself that makes you feel good, capable, and courageous.

It’s something that says within you – “I can” – no matter what the problem or situation.

Probably it is lot more than that. Your inner strength can make you do wonders. It is a vast reservoir of power that springs from within – an inexhaustible source of miraculous energy.

Inner strength is characterized by self control, self discipline, detachment, persistence, peace of mind, and the ability to concentrate.

With inner strength comes determination, the courage to persist, the power to change, the spirit of endurance, and the force to challenge.

For some people the definition of inner strength is a force of will, though it’s often just the opposite. When you want to find real inner strength, you need to find ways to weather life’s tribulations calmly and peacefully.

This can happen only when you don’t cling to your force of will, rather let it go, which will help you find your inner strength.

There are many tips to develop your inner strength and power as I had discussed in an earlier post. Finding inner strength is regaining the belief and confidence in oneself.

“You really have to look inside yourself and find your own inner strength, and say, “I’m proud of what I am and who I am, and I’m just going to be myself.” ~ Mariah Carey

How Can You Find Inner Strength

Anything that helps you find inner peace can also help in finding inner strength. Reaffirming your spiritual beliefs, getting in touch with nature, doing something to nurture yourself or taking time away from work will help you connect with your inner strength.

It’s in your trying times that you need your family and friends to find ways to come together and find the inner strength with one another. All it takes is a little bit of teamwork, determination, love, and understanding.

Most people show their lack of inner strength with sentences that include the word “impossible” or “can’t” in them. For example, I can’t cook, I can’t lift that bucket, I can’t lose weight, or it’s impossible to write, it’s impossible to earn money, etc.

With such negative thoughts, you are absolutely right, you can never do anything. So, what do you do? Hire someone to spoon feed you or do your work for you? I guess that’s not the path you want to take.

Thus, it’s important to introspect and converse with yourself about where you want to go in life, how you want to turn those negative “can’t” to “can” and “impossible” to “i-m-possible”, and how you want to get there.

Making mistakes, failing, and undergoing traumatic moments are all part of our lives. So, finding inner strength is all the more crucial in being happy, though what’s important is finding that inner strength so that you can rely on it even in your down moments.

Thus, never give up on working on your inner strength.

“Go within every day and find the inner strength so that the world will not blow your candle out.” ~ Katherine Dunham

The Key to Finding Your Inner Strength

How do you gather all the inner strength and courage to overcome sudden hardships? You can do so by turning your negatives to positives.

• Start gradually

You need to first start by taking baby steps to achieve inner strength. Don’t try to jump into immediate action that doesn’t work always.

Instead, find ways to support yourself and remove the negative words as mentioned above from your vocabulary.

• Think positive

If you have thought one of your goals as losing weight, then imagine yourself by closing your eyes at the weight you are aiming for. Imagine what you would be doing, thinking, and feeling.

You need to feel those emotions, then open your eyes and find ways to reach those goals by incorporating all that you felt.

• Remain positive

When your goals are set and you start thinking positive, your outlook to life will change. If you feel you cannot lose weight, instead of telling yourself that “I can’t” or “it’s impossible”, try telling yourself “I’m learning how to lose weight”.

Similarly, try shifting all your cant’s into a learning process and give yourself time to develop and find your inner strength.

Remember, your internal support system and inner strength is already present, it’s just waiting for you to tap into it and by taking small gradual steps, move forward to reach your goals.

“Strength does not come from winning. Your struggles develop your strengths. When you go through hardships and decide not to surrender, that is strength.” ~ Arnold Schwarzenegger

Ways to Find Inner Strength

Once you have made up your mind to tread on a path and think positively, developed a positive attitude, and have complete belief in what you are doing, you need to next find ways to discover that inner strength within.

Some strategies that can help you finding your inner strength on those difficult days are –

1. Take time to focus

You need to takeout time for yourself to focus on you and think about what you need to feel stronger. List out all your positive qualities and accomplishments, and if you can’t do that, seek help from your friends or family.

So, when you are feeling low or down, look up this list and feel good for your smallest of efforts. You need to remember that it’s very easy to think about failure and the negatives in life, but you need to fight those thoughts and learn  – to not fear failure.

2. Remain calm and patient

Confucius once said, “a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step”, so remember that problems may not be solved in one day, thus remain calm and patient.

Celebrate each moment when you take small steps towards solving a problem and feeling better, because those achievements are what help you find your inner strengths.

3. Stay active, sleep well, and have fun

Studies show that you improve your self-image and moods when you eat healthy, smile, exercise regularly, and sleep at least eight hours every night, so don’t forget to do these things.

Also, with the stressful lives we all live, it’s important to have fun by doing things you like to do. It could be things like watching movies, playing games, learning something new, attending live shows, make family time or even acting silly at times!

Just remember to be spontaneous, embrace your inner child, and let loose.

4. Interact and meet people

It would help you a great deal if you in turn volunteer to help others, which can help improve your self-confidence and build  inner strength.

Even attending peer support groups helps to receive support, guidance, and encouragement, and you get to meet new people who may be in a similar situation as you and would understand what you are undergoing.

You could even share your personal stories with trusted friends or others that will help you understanding yourself better and find your inner strength. If you don’t want to talk about your story, try recording it or writing it down in a journal.

5. Express yourself

Find ways to express how you would like to feel or how do you feel by doing things like dancing, drawing, writing, and painting. Try even just doing something you like or even trying to do something unusual by stepping out of your comfort zone.

Doing these various activities are great ways to get rid of negative emotions and energies, and you are able to understand yourself better this ways.

6. Repeat self-affirmations daily

Words or sentences like “I can do it”, or “This too shall pass”, or “I am doing the best I can”, are positive thoughts or affirmations to counteract the negative ones.

They make you feel good about yourself and boost your self-confidence and help youachieve wellness, which in turn helps discover your inner strength.

7. Spend time with family, friends, even pets

Surround yourself with supportive and helpful family and friends who keep reminding you about how good you are and listen to you whenever you need to talk or discuss things.

If need arises, it’s alright to ask for help without feeling ashamed or embarrassed, either from your family or friends, or even seek professional help if need be.

It’s been proven that spending time with your pet also improves your inner strength as your bodies release hormones that makes you feel stronger. So, go ahead and give your pet a hug for being a part of your life and helping you without even knowing about it.

“Be faithful in small things because it is in them that your strength lies.” ~ Mother Teresa

Here is another wonderful post on different ways to build  your inner strength that you may like. I also had to share this wonderful video about Nick Vujicic, whom I am sure you all must have heard of some time or the other.

Never Give Up ~ Nick Vujicic ~ You Tube video

Isn’t Nick’s courage and belief in himself an inspiration to all of you? If he can do so much and remains so positive, what’s holding you back? I guess it’s time to change your way of thinking, if you have problems believing in your inner strength.

Speaking of myself, being a freelance writer and working from home, I receive my inner strength from my work, kids and family.

I think I overcome my deepest emotions and convert my fears into strength and power when I know I have my husband’s full support and the love of my kids beside me.

“I was always looking outside myself for strength and confidence but it comes from within. It is there all the time.” ~ Anna Freud

Remember that changing your life isn’t always about learning more, but about using your inner strength. So, by discovering the way to your inner self, you will also find inner strength and peace.

Over to you –

What ways would you suggest to find inner strength in our lives? Do you feel it’s possible to develop your inner strength? Share your experiences of finding inner strength in the comments below.

SOURCE

13:30:00 - By Vincent 0

THE SIMPLE JOYS ARE THE MOST MEANINGFUL

By Mark Manson

The cute Brazilian girl in the cell phone store looks up at me and sputters a series of syllables in my general direction. She’s been fiddling with my phone for 15 minutes now, the phone I just bought for twice as much as I would have paid in any other country. Now she can’t get it to work. Explanation is pending, at least until I decipher the Portuguese syllable soup she continues to vomit at me.

I’m frustrated, if you didn’t notice.

“Não entendo,” I reply, for probably the twelfth time. It means “I don’t understand.” One of the only Portuguese phrases I know.

The coy smile she had given me the first few times I said it are now replaced with an aching impatience. She frowns at me, then at the phone, and then sighs. She pulls out a Post-It note, scrawls some Portuguese on it, hands it to me along with my dysfunctional new phone and slowly instructs me to go to another store in the mall and have them deal with it. She has to repeat these instructions three times before I understand them. This is the fourth cell phone store I am being sent to. Apparently there are a lot of bureaucratic procedures involved with buying a cell phone in Brazil, the details of which are obviously sailing clear over my head. And since none of the store clerks speak English, they’ve all eventually reached a breaking point, lost patience and sent me down to the next store to be somebody else’s headache.

The entire process has taken close to three hours… and it’s still not over. The mall cell phone nightmare continues.

(Although to be honest, it should have only been about an hour-and-a-half, I fell asleep in the Claro store waiting for a customer service rep to call my number. I awoke 45 minutes later to find they had proceeded to half a dozen customers beyond me. I strained to convince the rep to take me next since I had been there an hour. But my Portuguese persuasion skills weren’t very effective… OK, since we’re being honest right now, they were non-existent. I couldn’t say a thing, and therefore I hardly raised a fuss. Thus I took a new number and sat my ass back down, this time forcing myself to remain awake for the ensuing 30 minutes I would wait… again.)

I never resolved my cell phone issue that day. I finally found an old man in the mall who spoke English and was kind enough to come translate for me — yes, I walked around a Brazilian mall randomly approaching people to find someone to translate for me. It turns out that Brazil requires an identification number to activate any cell phone bought within the country, the equivalent of having a Social Security Number in the US to buy a cell phone. There’s a formal process that’s required and if you’re a foreigner and don’t work for a Brazilian company, then you’re screwed (unless you can get a friend to come in and register your phone under their name). As is probably obvious, I did not have any Brazilian friends with me. So almost four hours after arriving, I left the mall, having paid too much for a phone I still couldn’t use.

…And then got lost going home.

This was my first day in Sao Paulo. And I would be lying if I said days like this were rare. They don’t happen that often, but with enough regularity that the seething frustration, the awkward self-consciousness, the mental exhaustion, and the unavoidable sense of isolation, they’ve all become familiar to me now.

Today, internet entrepreneurship is the latest rage. Attachment-free mobile living is the new dream. And you don’t have to look much further than the 4 Hour Work Week to see the romanticization of such a post-modern lifestyle.

But as with any lifestyle, there are strengths and weaknesses to it. It’s not all a bed of roses. You sacrifice some things to gain others. And don’t worry, I’m not here to complain about every trying moment I’ve come across in two-and-a-half years of traveling. There have been far, far, far more good days than bad. And I would not take back a single life decision I’ve made.

But I do want to paint a realistic picture of what this lifestyle entails, the highs with the lows. And posit that perhaps the biggest difference between this lifestyle and a conventional one, is simply that the highs are higher and the lows lower, thus reorienting what one values spending their time on.

Because this is what you don’t hear, and that Tim Ferriss would never tell you: that day after the Brazilian cell phone debacle, after finally finding my way back to my hotel at dusk, I went and sat in my room by myself. Without TV. Without Wifi. No movies. No friends (not like I’d be able to call them anyway). Nothing to do. I went home and laid in bed for most of the evening. Physically and mentally drained and miserable.

And alone.

There’s nothing new about a bad day. We all have them. And we all have our own strategies to unravel our negative emotions. Sometimes we call up a friend and unload on them, perhaps over beers. Or we call up mom or dad and look for a little reassurance. Maybe we put on a movie with our significant other and just forget about everything for a few hours. Or maybe we hit the gym or take it out on a basketball court.

But life on the road, it’s quite often that you don’t have any friends to have beers with, you can’t call a parent and lean on them for some support, you don’t have a movie to watch or someone to curl up with, no gym membership, no basketball court. Often you have to take the brunt of your emotions alone, with nothing to distract you from them.

And it’s hard. But it makes you stronger, more mentally resilient, more centered. When you do eventually bounce back, life feels much lighter. And those joyous experiences you feel in contrast to the dark and lonely ones become that much better. In fact, I’ve found that the stark contrast between highs and lows has actually begun to redefine what those joyous moments are.

Some of my happiest memories from last year were going out and just having beers with some friends. Nothing more, nothing less. Something which I did weekly for years and years prior to this new lifestyle and that was always available to me.

It’s a bizarrely paradoxical effect on one’s emotional life: the extreme highs and novelty of experience render certain “exciting” activities to feel meaningless, and the extreme lows of isolation and frustration make many “normal” activities feel exciting and fulfilling. A Fourth of July parade looks a lot different after you’ve been to Carnaval in Brazil (twice) and stayed up three days straight partying in Ibiza. And I’ll give you a hint: it becomes really boring.

A road trip to the beach back home seems silly in comparison to living on the beach in Thailand, or taking surfing lessons in the swells of Bali. In many ways, you become jaded to your former life.

But on the other hand, the dark times of loneliness, depression, frustration, and isolation make other routine daily events of life — events which you and everyone else take for granted — that much better and more significant.

Last year, I got terribly sick in a rural town in India — possibly the last place on earth you would want to be sick. I had a scorching fever, cold chills and a headache that jackhammered the inside of my skull. I ran out of potable water at about 10PM, and the only stores in town had closed down for the night. I laid in bed through the entire night, unable to sleep due to fever and sweats. No medicine. Dehydrated and incredibly thirsty. And just to make things more interesting, a few hundred bugs swarmed into the room and were now crawling and buzzing around the walls, and occasionally on me.

Mom’s Christmas dinner tastes a lot better after an experience like that.

Which I guess is what the paradox resolves into: a devaluing of superficial pleasures and a greater appreciation for simple, authentic ones. I don’t really enjoy the presents at Christmas anymore, the fireworks at fourth of July, or even the parties on New Year’s Eve. I’ve seen bigger parties, been to more beautiful places, and already own everything I’ll ever want in this life. But unlike before, I appreciate every day spent with those who mean a lot to me. A quiet beer on a patio. Watching a basketball game together. Going to a birthday party or a barbecue. These are the events I look forward to now and get excited about, days and weeks ahead of time… And that’s probably the way it should be.

12:28:00 - By Vincent 0